My Addiction to Masturbation Helped my Sex Life

Photo by Devin Edwards on Unsplash

My addiction for masturbation began at a very young age; possibly began in middle school. I can’t exactly pin point where my fascination or addiction to masturbation came from but I can tell you it has enhanced my adult sex life. Maybe, it was the hidden porn tapes that I would find at my granny’s house when I would stay over. I believe that to be my introduction to sex.

One night I was looking through some VHS tapes in the room that I would sleep in and seeing the words ‘Honeymoon in Vegas’ or something like that. I am pretty sure that I was in middle school at this time. My granny was in her living room with her boyfriend at the time and they assumed that I was in bed fast asleep. I decided to pop the tape in and see about this Honeymoon. You can guess that I didn’t even know what a honeymoon was at the time. I was sure to find out that night. I turned the volume down because of course I was presumed to be asleep. What happened next was truly a site to see.

There was no introduction nor commercial playing like you see when you start a movie. I saw a women give a man a blowjob and boy did he look satisfied. My little self was glued to the screen; in complete awe at the action. I couldn’t take my eyes off the screen as I continued to watch the rest of the VHS tape.

I saw a women give a man a blowjob and boy did he look satisfied.

I could also equate my love for sex from the countless romance books I would read in high school. My mom was obsessed with black romance novels and street urban books. She had all the best reads like The Coldest Winter and Flyy Girl. My mom had me hooked on authors like Eric Jerome Dicky, Sista Soulja, Omar Tyree, Terry McMillan, and Carl Weber amongst the ones I can recall. She would read the books and then pass them to me to read because she knew how much I loved to read. I couldn’t wait for her to finish a book so that I could read it next. I was hooked to the characters and the sexual desires of these characters.

Over the years, I would touch myself at the mere thought that someone would want me the way that they wanted the girls in those books. I became obsessed with those books and would even read them twice over when I had the chance. I wanted nothing more than to be the flyest girl in school and wanted all the boys to want me; even though I didn’t want them. I only dated men that were older than me while I was in high school. It was rare that I dated anyone that went to school with me; I called it conflict of interest. You see, boys didn’t know how to keep their mouth closed; they wanted to brag to their boys.

I started having sex at the age of 16 and even then I felt like masterbating was much more fun than sex. My first time was in the school’s janitorial room; and it was not that pleasant. It lasted all of a couple minuets; literally. I’ll leave that for another story. 

I remember being as young as middle school touching myself before I actually had sex in high school. After losing my virginity, I did not have sex again for a couple years, I stuck with masterbating. Let’s face it, masterbating was safer and it saved me the heartache of messing with boys. 

What I found odd about masterbating at that tender age was the embarrassment. Not that anyone knew that I was doing it, but I would always feel super embarrassed and ashamed right afterwards; as if it were a bad thing to do. I had no one to share this with and maybe that’s why I felt so ashamed. I needed reassurance that it was ‘ok’ to masterbate. 

Fast forward to adulthood – I’ve masterbated in every relationship I’ve ever had; but they never knew until now.

I’ve been in my current relationship for 4 years now and it took me 3 years to tell him. One day I was doing some soul searching and it dawned on me that I was keeping a secret from the person I loved the most. I had naturally kept this a secret for many years so I guess you can say it seemed like normal practice to just keep it to myself. When I finally told my lover that I was masterbating on a weekly basis, he became curious. 

So, I broke it down for him. The morning was my go to for masturbation. You see, he always left for work much earlier than me and I would find myself ALWAYS horny in the mornings after getting dressed for work. This was the perfect time for me to scratch that itch. He wasn’t there to scratch it and I knew that I could get the job done in under 5mins. 

Surprisingly, he understood. I no longer felt weird or embarrassed about my fascination with masturbating. In fact, this little confession actually enhanced our sex life. He decided to get himself engaged in the act to give me the best satisfaction. I loved the fact that he would do anything to please me. Everything was about pleasing me and I loved that about him. He is the best with oral, so he always goes for the kill, lol. However, I am very sensitive down there when it’s almost time for my cycle to arrive (ladies get my drift), so I couldn’t handle the oral action. I told him that penetration or fingering me was the best course of action prior to oral to help warm me up. That small tweek now gives me the BEST orgasm I’ve ever had in my LIFE. 

Check out more short stories after dark – newest read Silly games Lovers Play – After Dark

Advertisements
Follow:
Share:

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: